Wednesday, December 12, 2007
The following advice was given to a brother struggling with sexual sin: "Like most men you will struggle with sexual temptation all your life. But let's be honest, most of our failures are deliberate. When you provide yourself with privacy and opportunity (dating alone, late nights with a computer, hotel rooms, isolation, locked doors, etc.) you will inevitably fail. Our penchant for 'alone-time' is planned failure sexually. Stop putting yourself in situations where you know you could fail because this is only allowing yourself to fail knowing that you will apologize to God later. This is pathetic discipleship. I admitted to myself years ago that I was a sexual wretch. I come by it naturally. So instead of trying to be pure I decided to be wise. My success or failure is seldom dependent on my self-control but on my living in open community where I don't allow myself the privacy to fail. Yes we need to work on self-control but even more effective I have found is confession of sin, communal living, pre-sin accountability (telling brothers where and when I will be in known danger), and orchestrating my environment to minimize privacy. This would include where and when you go on dates, with whom you live, placement of computers, and who knows your schedule. If you can't be a good man you better be a wise man."